There was a man who was in a horrible accident and injured. But the only permanent damage he suffered was the amputation of both of his ears. As a result of this unusual handicap, he was very self-conscious about having no ears.
Because of the accident, he received a large sum of money from the insurance company. It was always his dream to own his own business, so he decided he now had the means to own a business. He went out and purchased a small but expanding computer firm. However, he realized that he had no business knowledge at all, so he decided that he would have to hire someone to run the business. He picked out three top candidates and interviewed each of them. The first interview went really well. He liked the guy. His last question for this candidate was, "Do you notice anything unusual about me?"
The guy said, "Now that you mention it, you have no ears." The man got really upset and threw the guy out.
The second interview went even better than the first. This candidate was much better. Again, to conclude the interview, the man asked the same question again, "Do you notice anything unusual about me?"
This guy also noticed, "Yes, you have no ears." The man was really upset again, and threw the second candidate out.
Then he had the third interview. The third candidate was even better than the second, the best out of all of them. Almost certain that he wanted to hire this guy, the man once again asked, "Do you notice anything unusual about me?"
The guy replied "Yeah, you're wearing contact lenses."
Surprised, the asked, "Wow! That's quite perceptive of you! How could you tell?"
The guy burst out laughing and said, "Well, You can't wear glasses if you don't have any ears!"
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A blonde and brunette were watching the 6 o'clock news. The news was about a man about ready to jump off a bridge.
The brunette turns to the blonde and says, " I bet you $50 the man is going to jump."The blonde replies, "Okay you're on." Sure enough, the man jumps, and the blonde gives the brunette $50.
The brunette says, "I can't accept this money. I watched the 5 o'clock news and saw the man jump then." "No, you have to take it," says the blonde.
"I watched the 5 o'clock news too, but I didn't think he would do it again."
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A blonde decides to try horseback riding even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted, and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.
In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane but cannot get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider.
Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, and she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when ... the Wal-Mart manager runs over to shut off the horse.
